Add Us On:

Q&A

Have a question about how to delete digital drama from your life? You can submit questions to be answered by trained experts by sending an email to QandA@athinline.org. We will not be able to post an answer to every individual question, but we will answer the most common, so check back often.

To share your thoughts, or ideas on how to make things better (education, laws, etc.), please weigh in on our official Facebook and MySpace pages, or on Twitter (#athinline).

If you need help for yourself or a friend, please don't post it online -- sharing sensitive personal information online could make your situation worse and potentially compromise the safety of you or people you care about. PLEASE head to the Get Help section of the site, where you can connect personally with a trained expert or access immediate help.

QUESTION

My gf constantly wants to go through my phone and when I tell her no she thinks I'm hiding something. She has the passwords to both my Facebook and Myspace and goes through them everyday. If I change them she says I'm hiding something and makes me give her the new ones or threatens to leave and says she doesn't trust me if she doesn't have them. What should I do?

ANSWER

Although your girlfriend may not be aware of it, her behavior is a form of emotional abuse. A relationship is a partnership. You do not belong to her and therefore it is really important for her to demonstrate that she trusts you.  Being in a relationship does not mean giving up the right to have your own space and without trust, love is unable to grow.  Trust can be a really hard thing because you have to know something you can’t prove (for example; she needs to KNOW that even when you aren’t together, she is the only one you want to be romantic/intimate with). If she could communicate with you calmly about specific concerns or fears then you could talk through them together and begin to address the source of her trust issues.  However, if she is not willing to think about doing things differently, you may want to think about whether or not you want to be in a relationship with someone who does not respect your personal space.  Without trust, it is really hard for a relationship to grow and become strong and healthy.    

Boss of Me Campaign

Q & A Archives

  • My friend and I said some bad things about another girl on Twitter and she found out. We didn't mean for her to see it - we're we wrong? Read Answer
  • Some girls are sending me mean texts and Facebook messages. I don't respond, but it's starting to hurt. What do I do? Read Answer
  • I sent some nude photos over the internet 6 years ago - are they still lingering around? Read Answer
  • I sent someone "dirty pictures" on my phone, what can I do? Read Answer
  • My gf constantly wants to go through my phone and when I tell her no she thinks I'm hiding something. Read Answer
  • Is bra and panties considered sexts? Is it just nude pictures that gets a person under 18 labeled as a sex offender? Read Answer
  • I often get insecure and ask my boyfriend who he is talking to, should I stop? Read Answer
  • About two years ago, me and two other friends decided to go onto another girl's instant messaging account. Read Answer
  • If a young male & female who are dating and both under the age of 18 are caught sexting and are reported to the police... Read Answer
  • My boyfriend took nude pictures of me, and now that have broken up he refuses to delete them. What can I do? Read Answer

Chatter